The Fortune Cookie
Charles set down his chopsticks and let out a sigh. He couldn't eat another bite. The Orange-Flavored Chicken at Lu's was the best money could buy, both taste and portion-wise. He'd barely touched the fried rice, but that would heat up just fine for lunch tomorrow. Of course, he still had room for the fortune cookie. It wouldn't be a Lu's meal without that.
He broke open the plastic wrapper, devoid of the usual advertising. Strange. For as long as he could remember, Lu's address and phone number adorned the wrapper. Mr. Lu must have decided to save a bit of money. Didn't really matter, as long as the cookie was still light and tasty.
It snapped in two, same as always, and the fortune fell into his palm. These were silly, but he still got a kick out of reading them. Lu's fortunes weren't really fortunes at all, but silly sayings or old proverbs. When they did predict the future, it was something mundane that didn't matter anyway. So when Charles read this one, he let out a gasp.
"Tomorrow at noon, duck." And not only that, there were five lucky numbers listed: 2, 17, 23, 38, 41.
"What in the world?" Definitely a new cookie company. Seemed a little too specific. Whoever wrote this one probably just wanted to get as many people to look silly at noon as possible. As Charles tossed his trash, for some reason he pocketed the fortune. Just for laughs. Or at least that's what he told himself.
#
At lunch the next day, Charles found himself alone on the company smoking porch. He popped a cigarette into his mouth and reached into his pocket for his lighter. His knuckles brushed against a scrap of paper, which he fished out. The fortune from yesterday. He'd forgotten he'd put that in with his change and keys this morning. Why, he didn't know, but it sounded like a good idea at the time.
He glanced at his cell phone. 11:58. Should he duck? No one was out here, so he wouldn't look goofy to anyone but himself. He lit the cigarette and looked out into the beautiful courtyard the company provided. Sure, the hours sucked and the work was repetitive and boring, but at least he got this view a few times each day.
Noon. He chuckled and bent down to tie his shoe, just in case anyone was watching from one of the windows. Why he was following the random advice from the cookie was beyond him, but why not? It wouldn't hurt anything. And he could share a goofy story with the cute counter girl at Lu's next time he was there.
Glass shattered behind him. He fell on his butt and looked up. A bullet hole spider webbed the thick window. He peeked inside and saw an upper-management-type slumped over dead, blood trickling out onto his desk from the hole in his chest. Charles figured if he could see the floor behind the dead man, there'd be a puddle of organs and gore.
He looked up near the top of the buildings forming the triangular courtyard. Nothing. At that moment, his bravery--or shock; he wasn't sure which--wore off, and he dashed away. Should he tell anyone, or simply hope there were no cameras out here to pick up his presence? Had the cookie really saved him? Somewhere in the back of his mind, those five lucky numbers danced. He'd have to hit a convenience store on the way home to play the lottery.
This just made me hungry. Darn you, Eric J. Krause. Chinese is not on my diet!
ReplyDeleteGood one! I shall pay more attention to what my fortune cookies say in the future! I'm still smiling ^__^
ReplyDeletehelen-scribbles
Thumbs up!!
ReplyDeleteSee, I would have ordered duck for lunch. Good thing Charles is smarter than I am. Great story, Eric.
ReplyDeletemy fortune always says "you are doomed"
ReplyDeletehope he wins the lottery.
:0)
Can't beat Laurita's comment. Cool story.
ReplyDeleteYup, I'd definitely be playing those numbers after that one! Like John, I'm hungry too, but the nearby Chinese restaurant changed management — heck, complete staff turnover bottom to top — and the food isn't as good now. Off to Zaxby's as usual on Friday.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Laurita on the duck for lunch.
ReplyDeleteNow, what I want to know is; was the shot meant for him and the fortune a warning, or did it hit it's intended target?
Maybe I'm over thinking it a bit :)
I'm just glad Charles didn't add the "in bed" and follow that advice....
ReplyDeleteThat's some fortune cookie advice!
ReplyDeleteHowever, since the numbers weren't 4, 8, 15, 16, 23 and 42 I wouldn't play the lottery... :P
PS: I like Anthony's question! Wondering that myself...
ReplyDeleteGood story, I think I would be eating at that restaurant far more often if I were him. Then again, if those numbers come up, he can BUY the restaurant. :)
ReplyDeleteLet's see... you get one superlative from column A and one congratulatory remark from column B... and an egg roll.
ReplyDeleteReally enjoyed this Eric, put a smile on my face!
ReplyDeleteI love that fortune. That's actually an awesome writing prompt.
ReplyDeleteFantastic! Love the idea of the fortune cookie and fate interweaving.
ReplyDeleteThis will make you laugh: the first time I read the line "At noon tomorrow, duck", I didn't read 'duck' as in crouch down. In parts of Yorkshire (UK) 'duck' is a term of endearment and a friendly way of saying 'mate' or 'chuck'. So, I read this as an invitation to something! No idea what. Imagine my confusion.
I got a fortune cookie the other day with a completely blank piece of paper in it- no kidding. Don't know if I should think my world is coming to an end or if my future is an unwritten page - but no lottery numbers either.
ReplyDeleteI love the Chinese fortune cookie premise and the story that followed. I'm subscribing and want to read more :)
I'd be hitting the lottery as well. Good thing he decided to follow through with it, even if it looked goofy at the time.
ReplyDeleteAm I weird for wanting to know why anyone wanted someone at his company dead?!
ReplyDeleteFantastic story, Eric. I love the untold details. It looks like I'll be preparing some fried rice this evening. :)
ReplyDeleteTruly demented! I love it!
ReplyDeleteLOL Like this. I'd be getting a lottery ticket, too. LOL
ReplyDeleteToo bad for the fellow employee, but good that he didn't order duck like Laurita mentioned.
ReplyDeleteNice - the question is, was he the target or was the guy inside?
ReplyDeleteThanks for all of the great comments!
ReplyDeleteI found it funny that some of you went to "duck" as what to order for lunch instead of crouching down. That never even entered my mind, but it makes perfect sense now that I think about it. Good thing he didn't read it that way, or that executive-type would still be alive at his expense.
As for who the bullet was intended for, I intentionally left that vague. When I originally wrote this, I didn't. I wrote an epilogue of sorts in the voice of the shooter, who was an assassin. He went through a long, involved process of getting Charles that cookie because that's where Charles spent all of his lunches, and the shooter needed him out of the line of fire. But once I wrote it, I realized it weakened the impact of the story, so I cut it out and left it how you see above. Personally, I think the story is much stronger as I have it.
Eric... sorry I'm late to this but ... As always, your tales are fantastical and clever as all get ou ...
ReplyDeleteExcellent - great stuff. Had me pulled in right from the start
ReplyDelete